The Call to Ministry

For years, I have been praying for this ministry. For years, I have been actively asking God to prepare me, to guide me, to direct me. For years, I have been asking him what this ministry will be called. Just over a week ago, he answered - clear as day. 34:18.  

First, let me back up and explain this vision that has been growing and evolving for over a decade. When I was twelve years old, I made a to pursue ministry to young women. I was at the Dallas edition of The Revolve Tour, a conference for teenage girls to learn about and experience God. It was 2006 and I was listening to Jenna Lucado Bishop speak. I felt in my heart that God was calling me. In an excerpt of writing from March 28, 2012, I wrote, “Sitting in the audience, taking in the words of the speakers, the songs of the singers, and the skits of the actors, I realized that I was called to be up on that stage, too.”

That call, that tug on my heart, that whisper from the Holy Spirit, has been guiding me ever since. Every choice I have made since then has been guided by the decision to pursue the ministry I was called to as a twelve year old girl. To gain more stage experience, I pursued theatre in middle school and high school. To sharpen my speaking skills, I joined the high school speech team. To learn how to minister, I volunteered in my youth ministry, became a youth intern, and served on the staff of 3 other churches. I purposed in my heart to study communication and ministry so I could be further equipped to live out my calling. So at Dallas Baptist University, I earned a B.A. in Communication Theory and I minored in Christian ministry. I served as the captain of the DBU Drama Team that traveled all over North Texas to minister to and perform for youth ministries. I was hired to be a Resident Assistant in the dorms and mentored more than 60 young women over my three years there at DBU. Then, I went on to graduate school and earned an M.A. in Counseling. I became a Certified Christian Life Coach through the American Association of Christian Counselors and have been working to build my this ministry of writing for, speaking to, and coaching young women since then.

It’s been almost thirteen years since I first made the choice to pursue ministry. I have gone through seasons where I have begged God to let me start and instead He lead me into a time of preparation. I have gone through seasons when I asked, "Are you sure?" and he has affirmed my calling and built my confidence. I gave gone through seasons when I have wandered a bit to find the perimeters of my calling, testing the borders, and God has shown me how wonderfully non-conventional a life of ministry can look like. And here I am now, a 20something, coaching young women, subbing in the school system, consulting speech and debate teams, and sharing the gospel everywhere I am. He's shown me that it's all ministry. 

I am thrilled to be in such a place - an ever-changing, ever-growing, everything-but-cookie-cutter life of ministry. And I am overjoyed to have such a tremendous amount of love and support on this journey to reach the world. And I am humbled that God has finally given it a name - 34:18.

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. // Psalm 34:18

What Happens in Coaching?

Coaching is a relationship that most often is client centered and goal directed. Every coaching situation is unique, but usually coaches will begin by exploring the issues that the person wants to change. In what areas does he or she want to grow? Sometimes the person wants to be a better leader, better self-manager, or someone with a clearer perspective about where to go in the future. Christians in coaching may seek to determine where God appears to be leading them to go.

There is also the need for better awareness of where the person is at present. What are his or her strengths, weaknesses, abilities, interests, passions, spiritual gifts, values, worldviews, and hopes? Often the coach will use assessment tools to enable people to learn more about themselves.

Then comes vision. Coaches might assist people, organizations, or churches in formulating life-vision or life-mission statements. Coaches might ask, for example, “Considering your gifts, abilities, driving passions, and unique God-given personality, what is your life mission?” It takes time to answer a question like that, but without a clear vision, people, churches, organizations, and even governments tend to drift with no direction.

At some time, coaches will help people set goals and plan ways to reach these goals.

When obstacles get in the way, coaches challenge, encourage, and give accountability so the person can get past the obstacles and experience success. A coach can help you remove the blinders, allowing you to see what you may not recognize and give support as you move forward. A Christian coach is there for you, prayerfully listening to your concerns and asking questions that will give you clarity on your situation, get you past your own blocks, realize your God-given potential, and challenge you to be your best.

Copyright © Gary R. Collins, 2009, used with permission

What Do Coaches Do?

Coaches stimulate better skills. Good coaching helps people anticipate what they could become, overcome self-defeating habits or insecurities, manage relationships, develop new competencies, and build effective ways to keep improving.      

Coaches stimulate vision. Many individuals and churches have no clear vision. They keep doing what they have done for years, without much change and with little expectation that things will ever be different. Coaches work with individuals and organizations (including churches) as they think beyond the present, more clearly envision the future, and plan how to get there.      

Coaches help people grow through life transitions. Whenever we encounter major changes in our lives — such as a new job, a promotion, a move, the death of a loved one, the launch of a new career, or retirement — we face uncertainty and the need to readjust. Experienced coaches better enable people to reassess their life goals, find new career options, change lifestyles, get training, reevaluate their finances, or find information so they can make wise decisions.      

Coaches guide Christians in their spiritual journeys. Many believers understand the basics of the faith and aren’t looking to be discipled. But they need focused time with somebody who has been on the spiritual road longer, who models Christlikeness, can point out the barriers to growth, and can guide the journey.      

Coaches speak the truth in love. Good coaches know that sometimes the best way to help is by refusing to ignore harmful behavior patterns. Instead, coaches nudge people to deal with attitudes and behavior that should be faced and changed.

Copyright © Gary R. Collins, 2009, used with permission

What is Coaching?

The first time it was ever used, the word coach described a horse-drawn vehicle — a stagecoach that would get people from where they were to where they wanted to be. A modern bus does the same thing, and often these vehicles are called coaches. Most often today, coaches are people who help athletes and teams move from one place to another that is better and where they want to be. Even Tiger Woods has a coach to help improve his game of golf.

But coaches also help musicians, public speakers, and actors, who rely on coaching to improve their skills, overcome obstacles, remain focused, and get to where they want to be. Coaching is very popular in business and corporate settings around the world where “executive coaches” help managers and other business leaders deal with change, develop new management styles, make wise decisions, become more effective, cope with their hyperactive lifestyles, and deal with stress. Executive coaches work with people in business to help them move from where they are to levels where they are more competent, fulfilled, and self-confident than they would have been otherwise.

In summary, coaches guide people from where they are toward the greater competence and fulfillment they desire. Christian coaching is the art and practice of working with a person or group in the process of moving from where they are to where God wants them to be.

Copyright © Gary R. Collins, 2009, used with permission

Setting SMART Goals

We are halfway through January, so I have to ask... How are your resolutions looking? Did you even create resolutions for yourself? Do you know if those resolutions you brainstormed are attainable?

Antoine de Saint-Exupery once said, "A goal without a plan is just a wish." If there is something you want to do, it is imperative to set yourself up for success by creating a plan for achieving that goal. One of the most popular and successful methods of goal-setting is the SMART method. Setting SMART goals means setting goals that are specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and within a set time frame. 

A specific goal must answer who, what, when, where, why, and which? A measurable goal must answer how many, how much, and how will I know when it’s accomplished? To create an attainable goal, you must ask yourself, “how will I make your goal come true?” and figure out what skills, attitudes, and capabilities you have to develop. Realistic goals must have to be something you are willing and able to achieve. Finally, SMART goals are timely. You must set a realistic time frame to increase your sense of urgency.

I don't mean to offer a lecture here. I just want to make sure each of you know that there is an effective way to set goals for yourself!

I saw some resolutions this year like "read more," "get in shape," or "take time to travel". Those are awesome ideas! However, I would assert that a more effective way of phrasing those things would be something like, "Read one new book each month," "Run a 5K in December," or "Plan a trip to Spain for this summer." Make each goal specific, measurable, attainable, realistic, and time-bound!

Then for each of those goals, there are steps to take to achieve them. There has to be a plan. In order to run a 5K by the end of the year, you may need to 1. buy running shoes in January, 2. spend 30 minutes running each Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, 3. sign up for a 5K, etc. 

Another goal guideline that I suggest using is having a maximum of about three goals for yourself at a time. Setting too many goals at once makes it hard to remember and usually creates too much to work to do at once. Also, I believe it's important to make sure you have people in your life to hold you accountable. This could be a friend, your family members, a mentor, a life coach, etc. Finally, I would suggest that your goals be tangible. You should be able to feel, hear, touch, smell, or see their goal when it’s accomplished.

Goals are central to life coaching. As a coach, it is my job to understand how to formulate goals and how to coach my clients to achieve them. If you are looking toward 2018 and hoping for change in your life, consider setting SMART goals for yourself so you can create that change you seek. If you need some assistance at all, consider hiring a life coach to turn your visions and dreams into a reality!